2: After the email
by Julie Verne
Summary: After Sydney sends that fateful email, Maggie chases her down for an explanation. And it leaves her needing more explanations.


Maggie had tracked Sydney down to the on-call room, ready to confront her. But Sydney disarmed her quickly with her calm demeanour and frank apology, followed by an attempt at a joke, which Maggie attempted to smile at. Sydney watched Maggie carefully, eyes fixed on Maggie's mouth. Maggie noted the coy smile on Sydney's face, bit her lip, looked down – oh god, not there Maggie, don't look at her chest, her eyes are up there - fished for something to say.

"It was a good day," Maggie started, and was abruptly cut off by Sydney's mouth crashing into hers. Sydney cradled Maggie's face, and Maggie, out of some foreign instinct, cupped Sydney's face, only for Sydney to drop her hand to Maggie's shoulder, then down her chest before she pulled away. Sydney wandered casually from the on-call room, fingers brushing against her lips as she turned to look back through the window at Maggie, who was still propped against the bunk, her hand still raised.

"Huh," said Maggie, confused. She hadn't really thought of Sydney like that, hadn't thought of any woman like that – but it hadn't been horrible, and the shorter doctor was, objectively, quite attractive. It wasn't the worst kiss she'd ever had, and the spontaneity and the passion of the kiss had intrigued her. And Sydney's lips had been deliciously soft in a way she hadn't experienced before; so, so soft, the hand on her face so small and cautious and gentle for the sheer amount of spontaneity behind the kiss. Sydney had moved fast, had kissed Maggie hard, but somehow it was still a soft and surprisingly tender kiss. Sydney had looked back, hand to mouth as she walked away, and Maggie wondered if she did this to all her residents.

But then again, it was fairly obvious the frank and impatient doctor hadn't had a resident before. Maybe she was thinking of Dr Kalfas, who had done the same thing. Seems the staff obstetricians were unable to resist Maggie, Maggie thought ruefully.

Maggie had objected to Dr Kalfas' kiss.

It didn't seem like she had any objections to this one, other than Sydney running away, and blindsiding her. It was… sweet and passionate, two of the things she'd been missing in her past relationships. Still, she would have liked a warning sign.

But if there were any signs, Maggie had missed them. Sydney's talk of God and her professional veneer had probably thrown Maggie off.

Perhaps there were some signs, Maggie thought, sitting on the bunk.

And Sydney was so... small and fierce and dedicated and beautiful. Maggie swung her legs up and shut her eyes until her next call, wondering where the beautiful had come from, when she'd started noticing that. Obviously she'd noticed the first time she met Sydney, but she'd had the same thought on meeting Alex, and that had somehow dissipated to Alex being her best, beautiful friend – but Maggie was still nervous around Sydney in a way she had never been nervous around Dana or Dawn. There was something going on here, and Maggie didn't mind seeing it through, figuring out what it meant, even if it meant questioning her sexuality because somehow that felt less important next to how thoroughly she'd just been kissed.

Maggie realised now that Sydney's interest in her future was a little vested – she'd put in this time and effort, only to be fobbed off with a two-word answer. Sydney had been disappointed that Maggie hadn't treated her with the respect her position entitled her to, that their familiarity had affected her professionalism.

And then - she'd thrown professionalism out the window, and kissed Maggie.

How long had the other doctor wanted to kiss her? Maggie thought back, picked out a few moments she'd noticed were unusual and had put down to the other woman's awkwardness.

There was the way Sydney watched Maggie drink coffee, eyes on Maggie's mouth rather than the disposable cup. There was the way Sydney walked closer to Maggie than anyone else; no other doctor walked that close to Maggie, and Sydney didn't walk that close to anyone else, the shoulders of their white coats nudging each other, their hands sometimes brushing together, Sydney flinching at the contact of their bare hands but not pulling away. There was the way Sydney tried to joke with Maggie the way she didn't joke with anyone else; she was terrible at it, and small talk, but she attempted both with Maggie.

There was the way Sydney had reached for Maggie's hand after the miscarriage - Maggie had noted it at the time because Sydney never, never touched anyone's bare skin. Well, she avoided it when she could, Maggie had noticed, and to have the small, warm hand wrapped around her own was surprisingly comforting.

If Sydney wanted to pursue her, Maggie thought she might be ok with that. And if she didn't, Maggie wanted an explanation.

* * *

Sydney washed the last of her tears off her face. She hadn't meant to kiss Maggie, and at some point she'd have to face her and say something other than how desperately she had fallen for her resident. They had rounds together tomorrow, and Maggie was always asking questions – there was no way Maggie would just let this be an unexplained moment of weakness.

But Maggie was so – so forthright, so strong but so gentle, so perfect in that moment that Sydney hadn't been able to help herself. She'd known for a long time that she was gay but chose to ignore it.

Maggie had made ignoring it all but impossible. Sydney lived for the moments she spent with Maggie when Maggie would make a small joke, looking shyly for Sydney's approval. Sydney had even started trying to crack a few jokes of her own, even though she was terrible at it. She wanted Maggie to smile when she was with her, because her smile reminded Sydney that there was incredible beauty in the world.

It also reminded Sydney of Leviticus, of the condemnation of her people.

Sydney called the man her parents had arranged her to date , the man she'd been dating for a few weeks now. He was an option; Maggie wasn't. If she couldn't anchor herself to Herschel, she'd drown in Maggie - and she know what her community did to women like that, didn't want it to happen to her no matter how soft the lips of her resident were, or how sweet her smile.

"I'm ready," she said. "Let's get married."

* * *

Author's note: Based on Season 3, episode 8

Just a little note in thanks for all the kind reviews you guys have left - seriously makes me day and thankyou so much. I don't really know the etiquette - do I PM back since there's an option, or mention it in the next piece?

Either way, your reviews have been so appreciated and reread. Thankyou, and if you feel like leaving even a small review here I can promise it will make my day.


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